It's good to see someone is sticking to their new year's resolution of being devilishly handsome and less of a <insert rude body part name here>. Well done, keep it up.
In the spirit of being less of a <insert rude body part name here> we'd like to present you with this, the first broadcast of twenty6teen from Sorry Not in Service. Innit (in it) you will find plenty of anecdotes that could land us in hot water should they fall into the wrong hands, dentists, SPORT!, live draws, and shaming (see title, picture and content).
More than enough content there to distract you from falling back into the 2015 persona that marked you out as a complete <insert rude body part name here>.
For scale drawings of Monty Don's rippling biceps, go to his house.